Grief is a new feeling and it’s a hard one to describe with words. I know when I am having a bad moment the closest I can describe it as is anxiety… This is that feeling that comes up and I just need go. I go to one of my “spots”. There’s one spot I go talk to my son and watch the sunset. In that moment just as the sky is turning the perfect warm color… I feel as though I am getting a “Hug” from Al. It moves me to tears each time, but it releases the feeling of anxiety. Whatever was there becomes unlocked with the right key. I am then able to walk away with a feeling of love and connection to him❤
Alfred liked to help me cook. This became useful as he became older. I could have him start dinner for me if I was working late. I would just need to write down instructions. Al didn’t do well with verbal instructions. Anything more then 3 steps he needed to be redirected again( this was with everything not just cooking) I thought I had become pretty good with my ” Alfred instruction writing” but was once again proven wrong! … I had given Al written instructions on how to cook some frozen pizzas. I wrote the temp, time, what pans to use and how to preheat. I get home and was told that he saved me some of the pizza that he cooked. When I go into the kitchen I see the pizza on the right pans, there’s just one problem!!!! The cardboard is still under the cooked pizza 😳. ” Oh Alfred! you were suppose to take the pizza off the cardboard… the oven could of caught fire…..” I say to him. It’s at this point I am handed back my written note and told… ” Your instructions didn’t say that!”…. 😂😂😂
I loved learning from him and even more so laughing. Unlocking a beautiful mind was so simple… you just needed the right key.